Worried
Last week I had a dream that I gave birth to a boy. This one was much more about the labor part than the sweet baby part. There was no feeling of connection like the last dream I had. Mostly I think it brought my labor fears to the surface so I'd be forced to deal with them. In the dream our baby was taken away from me to the nursery without anyone asking. I had to fight with the nurses to get him brought to my room so I could see him. That's a huge concern of mine. I'm going to want that baby in my arms from the moment shrimpy's born. Also during labor I was given the dreaded episiotomy. I am seriously frightened at the thought of this happening. I'd like to try to go without pain management drugs because I've read that the baby is less responsive and more groggy and therefore less ready to feed when the mother has been given drugs. (Plus CanaMa had both of us 8 and 10 pounders naturally) On the other hand I want to be there mentally for the birth and not out of my mind in a pain induced delirium. When I'm in pain I tend to retreat into my head and block everything else out. I'm sure whatever I decide to do will fly out the window when I actually start to labor, but it would be nice to feel as if I have some control of mine body and our shrimps.
posted by Kathryn @ 10:56 AM
2 Comments:
At 6:17 AM,
NME said…
Again - to each her own. How you decide to have your baby and how you deal with the pain are very personal things. But I can tell you what worked for me.
I didn't make a concrete birth plan because I had a feeling that things would change once I was actually in labor. In my experience some women spend alot of time imagining their "perfect" birth scenario and when it doesn't turn out like that they are disappointed. Of the three mothers I know who wanted to go without drugs completely, all three ended up having a C section because of difficulties. But the endings are still happy because they had happy healthy babies.
I was pretty afraid of having an epidural because I'm worried about needles, especially put into my spine. But I was in labor for 19 hours and at hour 12 I was in a lot of pain and I knew Noah wasn't coming for another couple of hours, so I sucked it up and got the epidural. And boy was that a relief. Had I not gotten it I don't think I would have had the energy to push in the final stage, or the presence of mind to bond with Noah once he was born. And despite the epidural Noah was SO alert and fed great from moment one. And the hospital had a policy of keeping the baby with the mother so that was no problem either.
Whatever comes, you can handle it. My tip is just to focus on the Shrimpy and his/her welcoming into the world and not so much on how you'd like him/her to arrive.
At 9:28 AM,
hazel said…
well said, nicole.
I'd just add - be sure you know your hospital's policies, because it was not my hospital's policy to keep bella with me when she was born. nor was it okay for sean to go with her to the area where they test her. both of those things were what I wanted, and I got neither. they did allow bella to "room in" with me after all the tests they did, but for me, it was better for her to go to the nursery to be handled by caring, experienced nurses than to be cared for by my tired, delirious, panic-stricken self.
at any rate, the episiotomy is actually a welcome relief for some people. like when I had trent, and his head had a 14 and a half inch circumference. at the point where the head is coming out, I doubt you'll care if they make dreadlocks out of your pubes, as long as they get that baby the hell out of there...
anyway, you'll probably have 30 thousand more dreams about it all before the shrimp comes. and hopefully each of them will show you something about your fears so you can do something about them before you're in labor.
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