Mutherfucker
Based on the size of the baby my doctor has just recommended scheduling a c-section. How can we go against what the doctor feels is the safest thing? I would never forgive myself if I went ahead and tried to deliver vaginally only to put the baby in distress. Since he's very large there's more of a chance of that and I never want him to be in any distress. Not ever. So this is the best thing. My longest stay in a hospital was when I was born. I've never even had an IV, and now I have to have major surgery. I now have an entirely new list of concerns that I hadn't even entertained until today. A longer hospital stay, a scary scar, longer pain, I won't get to hold the "shrimp" right away, breast feeding could be compromised, oh and I could die from complications. I won't ever know what it's like to give birth naturally since it's such a risk to try after a c-section. I'm really scared. At least with a vaginal delivery I would have felt like I had some control over the situation.
posted by Kathryn @ 4:27 PM
8 Comments:
At 6:37 PM,
Missuz J said…
Oh honey. That does suck. Can't think of anything to say that doesn't sound fake.
Thinking of you a lot lately. (but not in a stalk-er-ish kind of way)
At 6:38 PM,
Anonymous said…
So sorry to hear this, but I've been through 2 c-sections and you'll be fine! I was able to nurse my second (a scheduled c-section) right in the recovery room as soon as they were done stitching me up. You can try for a v-bac still if you decide to have any more children. A friend of mine did, but if Ellis is truly as big as they are predicting, many times subsequent babies are even bigger (not always though!!). Also, both were c-sections and I was able to nurse both of them successfully for a long time...in fact, I am STILL nursing my "baby" who just turned 21 months old!
At 10:38 PM,
lonna said…
My c-section was an emergency, but I have heard that planned c-sections are easier. They use a slightly different anesthetic, I think. I have heard that recovery is easier and that nursing is easier. Also, if you want to make sure that you get to nurse in that first hour like they recommend, talk to your doctor. They might be able to schedule a lactation consultant to be present after the surgery.
At 8:06 AM,
hazel said…
I am sorry this got sprung on you like this. it sucks that you're not going to have the birth you had visualized. I know that makes things scary, I hate when I think I know how something's going to go and then it gets all crazy and different at the last minute.
maybe it will help to think about the birth, however it goes, as just a means to an end, and not as important on its own? whatever you have to do to feel better.
sending good vibes...
At 8:13 AM,
Anonymous said…
Kathryn, Renee is going to have her second c section with the baby due in Feb. she thinks it will be much easier than the first cause she worked really hard with Jadyn until she had to have the first c section when labor was too long..hard on her and Jadyn.
So, the one thing I have learned in life is that about the only thing we have "conrol" over in this life is how we respond to any given situation.So, breathe, meditate and trust..trust that you will be able to handle this..try not to fear..it really gets in the way of experiencing the present moment and you may miss out on some magic.
Make a grocery list and give it to your mom and cuz..I am sure that they can go get groceries..and I know they will understand a not as clean house and an empty pantry.Let them help.Relax as much as you can and enjoy the baby shower.
Kent will be there with you and you should have no problem with nursing. You are fortunate to live in a time when living better thru chemicals and learned surgeries can save lives and make things easier sometimes.
Its normal to fear the unknown,but some of your lovely blogging friends have had this experience and are sharing insight.
I love you...Auntie C*atherine
At 8:38 AM,
beanspot said…
I know a dad doesn't have all the work of a mother (to put it lightly) during birth, but I did learn quite a bit about childbirth and how to help make it easier:
They told us D was going to be huge too, and he wasn't. So you really don't know, all they are trying to do is make is easier on you and avoid other bad things that could happen to both of you.
From a father's perspective, I don't know which is scarier. At least with the c-section they can go right in and get the baby with having to worry about all the other things (at least the things I worried about a lot) like a cord around the neck, etc.
If there's anything I learned, it's to make sure Kent is very vocal about the nursing being THE most important thing after you are both okay. At least here in Iowa, we assumed they would know that and didn't. Lonna's right, you need to get that baby with you ASAP to nurse and get a lactation consultant too. Yelling might be required depending on how stubborn they are. Plus, make sure both of you are vigilant and don't let them give Ellis ANYTHING other than breastmilk unless there are serious problems. They gave D sugar water and formula because they didn't want to disturb Lonna at night and that made us very angry.
At 8:54 AM,
NME said…
That is tough - to have your plans changed for you. And surgery is scary. But SO many women have C sections and many prefer them.
Your Aunt Catharine sounds like a really wise woman. That bit about only controlling your're response is genius.
Ellis is at the finish line of all this - you just have to get there by any means necessary.
At 8:59 AM,
Anonymous said…
I had two C-sections and I was fine. My first was an emergency situation and it was horrible. The second was planned and it went well. A friend of mine tried to have a natural delivery where the baby was too big and the baby had all kinds complications due to loss of oxygen and also had head trama because she ws stuck in the birth canal. I'd recommend for the safety of the baby doing what the doctors recommend. The recovery was not as horrible as I thought it would be.
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